Friday, January 16, 2009

Only in Mexico


12/29/2000 Mazatlan Old Town
5 p.m. beer and botana at Son Sin

Calendaria (the very lovely handmaiden of beer and all good kitchen things) comes over to the table where I sit eating her delicious homemade soup - in her hand she has a large spoon which she dips into my bowl, removing one of the onions to return to her cooking pot.

Only in Mexico - where if you have no Spanish, the heart is always softened by smiles.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Mabel Frances Weber Valentine, nee Cooper

This is my gram at 16 years of age, four feet eleven and solid steel. She made the dress she's wearing, I guess everyone made their own clothes in those days. Too bad we don't still cherish that art. Grammy died on March 4, 1994, just two months shy of her 101st birthday. She was born May 1, 1893 in Elgin, Nebraska. I remember on her 100th birthday asking her what she thought about it, she said, "I don't know what happened to the first 99 years!" At 100 years she was a little hard of hearing, but the thought processes still worked fine. She never lost the twinkle in her blue eyes either.

My gram is the one I talk about in an earlier post about gardening. She lived in an apartment in Seattle then and I remember like yesterday when she gave me that package of nasturtium seeds, took me outside to the big concrete planters that bordered the sidewalk and said, "plant them." So I did, and watered and watched every single day. When that first little green sprout stuck its head up, I was ecstatic (remember, I was only 10). And then they grew like crazy and there were big bunches of bright orange flowers cascading all over the place all summer long. A perfect plant for a kid to start with - easy to grow, prolific, and gorgeous! That is how my life-long love of gardening got started. My gram never dumped poison on the earth either and neither have I.

I don't know much about Gram's early life. She met and married a man named Gus Weber who was born in Switzerland and stowed away on a ship when he was 15 to reach the shores of America. He was an artist, a newspaperman, a musician who had his own band. He fought in the Spanish-American war, was injured, and later died in a VA hospital. I never knew him because my mom was only 12 when he died. Gram was left with five little boys and three little girls to raise. I don't know how she did it. She eventually married Grandpa Bob Valentine. My impression, gained at the age of three, was of a sweet man who took time to give me rides in his old car and tried to teach me about chickens and eggs and such. I wish I knew more about him. My father was in the service then and when we moved away from the mid-west, we never returned. But still, if only people would realize how valuable their lives are and how important to keep logs, or journals to pass along vital information, as well as impressions of the events of the time.

Grammy spent many years researching her family's roots. The Mormon church has very extensive genealogy records and that was her main source of information. I often wonder how much more she could have learned if only she had a computer. As it was, using only the telephone and the U.S. mail, she filled a very large binder and found relatives going back 400 years. It is a fascinating piece of work that she left us - I hope to maybe pick up where she left off, but that may be a job best left to the next generation.

When I was 11 or 12, Gram showed me how to make a pattern using an already-made shirt and then I cut out the material and made another shirt! That's the way they did it "in the old days." Wouldn't hurt to revive some of those old abilities now. She guided me in baking my very first apple pie from scratch and it was a gorgeous thing, perfect crust, perfect filling, golden brown. Thinking back now, those simple things she taught me, the results she let me have all on my own, that's really what happiness turns out to be - the simple stuff.

Grammy never smoked a cigarette or touched a drop of liquor and the only times I thought I heard a curse from her mouth would be those times she would be flipping through a magazine and come upon an ad for some kind of booze. The rest of the time she expressed disapproval by saying, "Aw shaw!"

Grammy enjoyed Lawrence Welk. I remember watching it with her, laying on the floor looking over at her every now and then where she sat on the sofa, big smile on her face. She loved Norma Zimmer, the Champagne Lady, and I loved the bubble machine. There were a lot of good shows on TV in those days, radio too - we didn't have to be embarrassed by nudity and sex scenes on family television, or frightened by violence and gratuitous bloodshed. I think the experience of watching TV together was a whole different thing then, mostly we laughed together and didn't have to look around trying to avoid each other's eyes because we were embarrassed.

I miss Grammy. She had a long life, parts of it sad, parts of it happy, but she was always included up to the day she died and she always had a smile. That's the way families ought to be.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Two good things

  • Being first to stick a spoon in a new jar of peanut butter.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Douglas Dresch

You were my friend.

Imagine a whole bunch of words here
twenty years of laughter, tears,
anger, joy, words shouted, songs sung.

Imagine a very large hollow place
where your energy once
occupied the earth and filled
corners now left empty.


Imagine me imagining all that
and wondering how shattering the weeping
when suddenness and shock depart
and leaves life alone here.

Rest in Peace good buddy.

Apology


Last week, to anyone who would listen or who was trapped by circumstances and forced to listen, I issued my usual smug assertion about how "I have been driving on snow and ice for umpty-ump years and have never had a problem..."

Several decades ago I lived in Cheyenne, Wyoming and it was there I turned 16 during a January blizzard. My uncles Bill and L.C., themselves just kids in their 30's, took me out and showed me the ropes about driving on snow and ice. In Cheyenne in January, there really isn't any other choice.

My lessons were basically two:
1. Drive slow, even especially when it seems like everyone else is moving along at the speed limit.
2. Keep your foot off the brake. If you must use it to stop, tap tap tap, never mash the brake on snow and ice.

In case of skid or slide, turn the wheel toward the slide. Uh huh.

There were other things they taught me as well, eyes must always be moving; rear-view mirror, side mirrors, side of the road, ahead and behind - always know what is around you and where it is. Driving the way they taught me earned a lifetime of no accidents, no tickets, no squishing of small animals. And I really felt I knew my way around ice and snow and the road.

Until now. In my own driveway. I apologize for my arrogance and thank you for not saying whatever it is you're thinking, for even after the snow melts, I will need a tow truck to get me out. Lesson learned.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Marilyn Eylar

Mrs. Eylar,

I waited 45 years too long to tell you. For that I am profoundly sorry for it may be too late.

You were the best teacher I ever had.

You never let us get away with doing things the easy way. You forced us to think, you brooked no nonsense, you graded hard.

You made school worth it.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Aphids


Okay, so aphids aren't the greatest things to have around. They are tiny, soft-bodied insects that come in a variety of colors (the little bugs on the right in the picture). Aphids are most often seen in their wingless form, less than 1/8" long and in middle to large-size groups which generally contain eggs, nymphs, winged and wingless adults - all of which are female. The first time they reproduce, they do so without a male, which is why they seem to break out in such huge numbers all over your plants. The longer they are allowed to remain, the more quickly they will completely overcome the plant until it seems to teem with them as though it had a second skin.

In the picture above, the orange and blue pupae, or larva, on the left is actually a ladybug pupae which is about to consume large quantities of aphids, their eggs and nymphs.

Here is a picture of a ladybug larvae as it might appear to you in your own garden. Remember that the colors can range anywhere from light yellow and purple to deep orange and blue or any combination thereof. You don't want to inadvertently squish one of these - they destroy massive amounts of aphids. Spiders also consume large quantities of aphids.

It is fairly easy to get rid of aphids if they are caught early. I simply run my fingers up and down the stems and over the leaves where I find them, taking care that I don't destroy any beneficial insects while I'm doing it. Aphids are easily dislodged with a spray of water, but I don't use this method until it is quite warm outside because I always end up soaking wet myself! I have noticed over the years that aphids tend to confine themselves to one vertical area on a plant when first starting out. Therefore, when I see aphids in early spring, I look below and above the branch and usually find more hiding out. There are plants like nasturtiums and marigolds (and many others) that seem to attract aphids and people plant them for that purpose. Using the hand removal method, an occasional spray of water, and the cooperation of a multitude of beneficial insects will keep the aphid population pretty well under control. There will always be a few hanging around, but they will do minimal damage, especially compared to the damage that might be done if pesticides were used instead of organic methods.